How to Take Your Power Back
Early on I was obsessed with the idea of falling in love…boy-crazy for a lack of a better term.
When I was 9 years old (and yeah, I was a huge Chicago Bulls fan 😂) I was tricked into kissing my boyfriend. I didn’t really want to kiss him but he told me I should and it didn’t occur to me that I had the power to say “NO”!
Long story short, my dad found out about it (listen to my podcast to find out how he found out, it’s a crazy, hilarious story but at the same time super powerful).
He sat me down and told me something that I would never forget and up to this day it has helped me when it comes to raising my 2 young girls.
Steps on How To Get Your Power Back
- Learn to say “NO!” - You have to realize, you have a voice, you have the choice, you have a say in things. If you don’t want to do what he’s asking you, you don’t have to! Ask yourself, is this guy really worth it? Is he worth my time? If you answer no, then it’s time to say “bye-bye”.
- Realize it’s never about “do they like me”? But it should be, “DO I LIKE THEM?” - Who cares if they like you? The real question is DO YOU LIKE THEM? You don’t have to do sh*t with all the guys who like you. Just like what my dad told me back when I was a kid, there will be a line of boys who would want to kiss me, but I can’t go around kissing all of them! So you see, you have the option, you have the power.
- Stop using intimacy to get love! - Even though at 9 years old my dad helped me take back my power, I began to give it away again in my teenage years. I used intimacy as a way of getting guys’ attention because I thought getting physical early on was the way to do it. I was scared nobody would want me if I didn’t do all these things to satisfy them. But getting physical early in relationships didn’t get me what I truly wanted, love. It actually made me feel worse. I felt less than. I didn't feel like I was enough.
Listen, I am not at all going to judge you ever.
If he pressures you into getting physical despite telling him you are not ready, then you know this relationship isn’t worth it, it’s time to say “bye-bye”.
Is there anyone in your life you need to say “bye-bye” to?
Remember, it has to be Crazy Love or Nothing.
Your love coach,
Jackie
